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Sunday, May 31, 2009

The blog in the paper

MS Night

DON'T forget, there's a big MS fundraising night been organised in the town on June 12th and Shane Gorman will be heading home from New York for the occasion. He was diagnised with MS some time ago and has since launched a great website, with some wonderful items on Ardee - even this column got a mention, ta, Shane.

There's a great section termed 10 cool things about Ardee and the likes of Caroline Giggins in Australia, Nicola Taaffe, also in Oz and Boston boy Cathal Conlon have all added their bits.

So what are the 'cool' things about Ardee? I'll have a go here. 1. Seamus Farrelly; 2. Murph!; 3. The castle; 4. Vincent Farrelly; 5. The Square Utd team of the mid 90s - class!; 6. Dermot O'Brien; 7. The turfman (see above); 8. The Jumping Church; 9. The speed camera outside the Hunterstown Inn (have you ever been caught?); 10. Deeside Doings.

If you'd like to send your best 10 cool things about Ardee send them on to me and who knows, Shane might even add them to his website too.

Thanks for the mention Hubert, I hope you will come to rhe benefit gig. It should be great.

Fact. Alabama

In Jasper Alambama it is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.

Facts. Tennessee 2

Also in Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive by herself,"a man must walk or run in front of the vehicle, waving a red flag to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists."

Facts. Tennessee

In Dyersburg Tennessee it is illigal for a woman to call a man for a date.
It's true !!

Saturday, May 30, 2009

New meaning to getting stuck in.

Ah well the last time I saw such a scene was on he way out to Stabanon in Tony Lynch's taxi.

Los Campesinos. You ! Me ! Dancing

Class video from the Cardiff based band Los Campesinos. I had no idea the band where from Cardiff at all. I was sure that they had to be from U.S and A. Los Campesinos is the Spanish for "the peasants" incase you where wondering. Enjoy the up beat tune and cool video.

Friday, May 29, 2009


Look at this awesome invention. It will brighten up even your heaviest days.

Ferris Bueller

The house from the Ferris Bueller movie is up for sale.The asking price is 2.3 million dollars. The house was made famous in the scene when Buellers friend Cameron kicked his fathers red ferrari and sent it flying through the window.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Bethenny Frankel from Housewife's New York reveals more than her book the other day.
Not bad for an auld one !

Corner Furniture

This is actually an add on tele here in U.S and A. It has to be one of the cheapest worst add's there is. Hold on to your trousers Jay Z.

Pixie Spitfire

I've been to see Badly Drawn Boy at Spiegletent In the city before and I thought it was really cool. I couldn't believe my eyes when I seen Ardee's own Pixie Spitfire performing in Dublin at Spiegletent. She is looking fantastic I might add, to think people say nothing cool comes out of Ardee. Go on Siobhan.


Did you know that Flamingo's pee on there legs to cool themselves down.
It's a Fact !

Passion Pit. The Reeling

I think Boston based Passion Pit are one of the cooler bands to hit the scene, opening up for such bands as "death Cab For Cutie" and "girl Talk".They put on a deadly live show as a five piece set. The video is pretty cool too with a groovy kinda eighty's feel about it. Now get foot tapping yis whores.

Matt and Kim. Lessons Learned

I have been listening to Matt and Kim for the past while but I had not seen the video of lessons learned until today. I must say the two of them must have some balls to go in the nip in Time Square and believe me the cold at that time of year would skin the balls of ya. Ah sure leave them alone when there quiet, there just grand !

Monday, May 25, 2009

Holy Sardine

Look at the state of the 1960s Batman. How did they get away with it.
"Anti Shark spray"

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Titus Andronicus. Titus Andronicus

Rock out with your cock out, Roll out with your pole out, Hang out with your wang out to Titus Andronicus self titled tune. Deadly !!

Radiohead. Let Down

My favourite song from O.k Computer. Jesus I used to blast this in my bedroom over 10 years ago in Ardee. I must be getting old. Ive been to see Radiohead in Dublin and it was great, what I can remember.

American Idol

The American Idol finale was on last night, Chris Allen won the title but if you ask me the Adam Lambert lad should have won. Adam was way better, he's kinda glam rock and could fit in perfectly in the 80s. I'm pretty sure he is gay and if he's not out know he will be with in two years. The high point of the night was Kara Dio Guardi vs Bikini Girl. Great Success.

Seperated At Birth

Prince and feather weight boxer Rihanna. Nigga Wha !!

Seperated At Birth

Berbatov and The count from Sesame Street, What ya think.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Swine Flu

Spot the swine !!

The Fattening Of The Pig

It's getting close, Friday June 12th, The Bailey, 9 til late. 5 bands - Just Friends,Tenderhoox,Cunning Stunts, The Enemies and Cheeky Pigs plus a Pig Roast.
Tickets only 10 euro @ The Bailey and other locations.

Wwhhooo Bodyform

Breath taking scenery, beautiful girl, a yacht, blistering sun and fanny pads. You gotta love the 80s.

Lets Wrestle. I wont Lie To You

Lets Wrestle made quite the slash at SXSW this year and I think are class. I like the mad video. Lets Wrestle !!!

The Von Bondies.C,mon C,mon

An old tune that I forgot all about. C,mon C,mon came out a few years ago and was featured a some car commercial. I saw them when they supported Razorlight and they where deadly, if you get a chance go see them.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Japanese Bruce Willis

The Japs have some mad T.V shows alright. In this show we see the Japanese contestants dressing up and acting like American actors. HHORRYY !!!!!!!

Japanese Ronald McDonald

Mad Japanese bastards. Only In Japan

Sunday, May 10, 2009

George Fornby. Chinese Laundry Blues

About seven years ago when I was in my Frank Sinatra, Louie Prima etc phase I came across George Formby. I like the innocents of the lyrics and the happy tune from the mandolin. Can you imagine 50 euro rappin about Mr Wu and his dirty laundry.

The Avalanches. Frontier Psychiatrist

Great tune, mad video. Check out The Avalanches

Bull In Supervalu

A bull got away from his master in Ballinrobe and decided to go for a look around the local Supervalu. Only in Ireland.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Fly Fishing By J,R Ewing

As everybody knows that nuns love a tasty bit of fish, it brings me back to the time when me self and a couple of the lads where down the Dee fishing as we used to do on the summer holidays.
It all began on a rainy Tuesday morning. I woke from the leaba ( Ni raibh scamail sa spare agus leam me ar an leaba agus leam me ar an rothar go dti an river Dee agus is maith liomsa milsean agus mo laithroith mor ).You might need Di Vince and his code to figure that one out. I woke up and scoffed half the sliced pan in to me that Joe The Bread man had just delivered. As i sat there at the table eating my toast i stalked the mammy like a Venus fly trap waiting on an unsuspecting Blue Bottle. I stalled and sipped the tay slow and made no sudden moves, next thing the washing machine became silent and this is when I knew the time had come. The Mammy moved like a fox, sly and calculated watching every move, but I knew I could make it happen. "What happen you might wonder" The quest for the Fairy Liquid, With out the sacred Liquid for there might no worms which would equal no fish. As the Mammy headed for the machine I knew the time had come... I darted to the sink and horsed as much Fairy Up Liquid as I could into a small jar which I had obtained at an earlier date.
A successful mission it was. I began to make my way to my friends house where we would conjure the worms from the earth like Gandalf would summons his massive eagles for help on his quest.
On arrival to Dunnys we Immediately mixed the Fairy liquid with like a witches potion. We spawned a large quantity of bubbles, this is when we knew the plan was in effect. We emptied the bucket of water containing the well earned Fairy Up Liquid on to the grass and waited for the magic to happen.
As if the Divil him self had driven the slimy beasts they call worms from the ground they slowly but surely one by one started to rise from the earth.It was a sight to behold as worm after worm burrowed from the earth like the zombies in the Michael Jackson Triller video, mad it was.
To us the worms where like crack is to an addict, we had to have them as they where the key to winning the fishing contest beyont in the Dee.
For years we mastered our skills of casting, spinning, floating and dredging the Dee in the quest to see who could get the most money from the nuns in the convent.The nuns where extremely fond of the old fish seen as they couldn't eat to many sausages they paid top dollar for a good large smelly trout. The competition was on.....
Saturday morning, eleven o'clock, me, worms, me tackle, Jucky Shields, John Sherry, Joey Fay, Trevor Ward and Bobby Dunne. It was similar to the Grad Prix in Monaco but different. The mission was who could catch the biggest trout and sell it to the nuns.
We all took our favourite spot along the Dee and casted off. Everything was going well apart from the traces of fairy up liquid that was coming from the worms and scaring the fish away but next thing out of the blue we spotted Joe Austen coming in the Burger truck, Joe Finnegan coming videoing none other than feckin Beyonce Knowles coming down the Dee with a huge big black rod in her hand, it wasn't Jay Z's it was a lovely six foot pole belonging to 50 euro.
She approached us and asked if she could join the fishing competition, of course we agreed as it would only be the Ardee way to be nice and then slag the shite of her minutes later.
She began to tug on the big black rod with great anger as the hook was stuck it the eye of the big black rod. Her being Sasha Fierce and all didn't want any help undoing her tangled line but whats a man supposed to do with that huge pipe in your face and the rod about to poke threw your britches. She couldn't manage the big rod to well so she decided to move on to a young Irish lad and see what would happen.
All was well but still no fish from anybody,Beyonce started to get all diva and requested only red maggots to be put on her hook, What do you do only oblige.
The time passed and it was getting late in he evening and the nuns where finished the Saturday Vigil and mad for fish, with the pressure mounting Beyonce decides that worms just weren't gonna do the trick so she takes of her 20 million dollar ring from Jay z and ties it to the end of the line. It sparkled and gleamed as she held the big black rod tightly between both hands, she gave the rod one huge big tug and out came the line like a load of sea men getting out of a submarine after a six month trip below.
In no time at all the trout where tugging at Beyonces rod and she began to tug back and reel in the big fish.Slowly but surely the fish came to shore, as it drew nearer we had to take our sandwich's and tay of her shelf like ass as she needed to reel the beast in.
Beyonce took in a nine pound trout and put all the Ardee boys to shame. We had nothing to say, all we could do was ask how she managed to catch the monster trout... she said "if you liked it then you should of put a ring on it".
She then headed to the nuns with the fish and she got ten quid for her troubles.
And that's that, threw story. If you like it then put a ring on it. Wha !!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Joke. Mrs Rowntree

Mr Cadbury and Miss Rowntree met on a Double Decker, it was After Eight.
She was from Quality Street ; he was a Fisherman's Friend.
On the way they stopped at a Yorkie Bar, he had a Rum and Butter and she had a Wine Gum.
He asked her name, 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said.
'I'm the one with the nuts,' he thought!
Then he touched her Milky Way.
They checked in to a hotel, and went straight to the bedroom. Mr Cadbury turned out the light for a bit of Black Magic.
It wasn't long before he slipped his hand into her Snickers and felt her Cream Egg. He fondled her Flap Jacks then he showed her his Curly Wurly and TicTacs.
Miss Rowntree wasn't keen to have any Jelly Babies, so she let him take a trip down Bourneville Boulevard via her Party Ring. He was pleased as he always fancied a bit of Fudge. It was a magic moment as she let out a scream of Turkish Delight.
When he pulled out, his fun size Mars Bar felt a bit Crunchie. She wanted more, but he needed Time Out, however, he noticed her Pink Wafers looked very appetizing. He did a Twirl, had a Picnic in her Sherbet Dip and finished off by giving her a Gob Stopper!
Unfortunately, 3 days later his Magnum lolly started to drip. It turned out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Basset who had Allsorts.
Thank Belinda

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Joke. The Blonde

Blonde wife calls husband, "I've run out of petrol and i'm scared to fill up because of the swine flu.The husband says ya daft twat it's in Mexico not Texaco

Sam Malone

Sam Malone for presidant !! That's just one guys opinion. You need to be a cheers fan to get it.

Tractor Burnout

Look at the schmoke lad, look at the schpinnin whales on that yoke, go on ya boy ya let her fly ya mad bastard !!!!!

Random Things I Like, But Just A Wee Bit






Knight Rider

Rhubarb Crumble

Prarie Dogs

The Ting Tings


Ash Trays




Egg Salad

Track Suits

Fanny Pads

Indiana Jones

Hanging Shelves
Power Rangers

Washing Dish's

Big Knickers

Cooking The Fry

The Green Scene

Stone Wash Jeans


Peanut Butter


I like these things, but just a wee bit.

Interpol. NYC

Ive seen Interpol a few times and they put on a class show. A wee bit mellow and dark sounding at the best of times but none the less great.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

The Fattening Of The Pig

This is the final poster for "The Fattening Of The Pig" fundraiser for MS Ireland.
There will be five bands - JUST FRIENDS, CUNNING STUNTS, THE ENEMIES,TENDERHOOX and the reunion of CHEEKY PIGS, Ardees legendary rock band. Tickets are only 10.00 Euro, there will be a full pig roast too. It takes place on Friday June 12th at 9pm and will go on into the wee hours. The venue is The Bailey, 99 Irish st Ardee Co.Louth.
Tickets can be purchased at The Bailey or at the door on the night of the event.
Im trying to get some other locations to sell tickets so look out for the posters.