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Friday, December 18, 2009

Things Dubs bleedin love

01 Aslan
02 Heroin (See 1)
03 Stealin'
04 Joy-ridin'
05 Saying 'Yaknowwhorrameyan?'
06 Shamrock Rovers
07 Social welfare
08 Keyin' Cars
09 Pop Idol
10 Wearing belly tops over their pale, flabby stomachs
11 Calling people 'Bud' who are not their bud
12 Compo
13 Calling people 'Pal' who are not their pal
14 Shortening words and adding the letter 'o' (Anto, Decco, Corpo)
15 Calling people 'Boss' who are not their boss
16 John Player Blue
17 Burberry
18 Burglary
19 Fair City
20 Celtic shirts
21 'Taches
22 Fireworks every night for the entire month preceeding Halloween
23 Sky Digital
24 Saying 'I didn't bleedin' do tha'!'
25 Travelling in packs
26 Moochin'
27 Swearing at their babies
28 Getting their mot's preggers
29 Champion Sports
30 Christmas Lights you could see from space
31 Skippin' school
32 Skippin' bail
33 Giving their kids Monster Munch and Maltesers for breakfast on the bus
34 Standing in queues outside the dole office
35 Funtasia
36 Iceland - the food chain, not the country
37 Man U
38 Saying, 'That's not my bleedin' job!'
39 Pushing prams while smoking
40 Earrings (for guys)
41 Earrings a chimpanzee could swing off (for girls)
42 Saying 'He didn't do nothin'!' when he clearly did do something
43 Baseball caps
44 Sawn-off Shotguns
45 Adrian Kennedy Phone Show
46 Picking up unfinished cigarettes dropped on the street by someone else just after coming out of a medical centre (as God is my witness)
47 Shop-liftin'
48 Tamangos
49 Not payin' the bus fare
50 Curry Chips and a burger
51 Leaving their kids play outside on a busy road while they get hammered on a Sunday afternoon
52 Always following the word 'rich' with the word 'wanker'
53 Pulling their hoodies over their heads as they're led away from the Four Courts
54 Eschewing peaceful solutions to conflict when Violent Senseless Mayhem will suffice
55 Pissing in Elevators
56 Being an authority on everything
57 Knee-cappings
58 Racism
59 Smiley Bolger
60 Getting their hair cut so tight they look like a matchstick with ears from the back
61 Not readin' bukes

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