Ardee observations

In my 21 years living in Ardee you notice some strange things......

1. People greet you with "did you hear who's dead"


2. People greet you with "well" does this mean that people in Ardee are to lazy to say the whole sentence for example.

Normal people - How are you today. I am well thank you.

Ardonian - Well, what's the craic.

3. Instead of waving some people use the claw or hand span.

Explanation - The claw or hand span is used widely in Ardee as a greeting or wave, It consists of one spreading there hand so all fingers and thumb is spread apart like a bunch of bananas, then with a downward motion of the wrist the claw or handspan is in effect. Some times the claw or handspan may be dickied up by opening the hand as before but instead of a downward motion one can use a vertical up and down motion. It's so easy a Cavan man could it. I must add, the claw or handspan works best when presented across the wind screen of your car as you pass by a friend on the road. Or driving any sort of tractor.

4. Nearly everybody from Ardees first job was picking strawberry's with Pajo and Francis Commins. I personally was ran after about 2 hours with the phrase "go way you, your fuckin atein more than your pickin" Classic.

5. Why is there nearly always an empty bottle of Lucozade on Dunne's wall at the top of the town. Or is that the bottom of the town ?

6. People get excited to know who has the first new car with the new years number plate.

7. Mario's and the Chinese in a dietary staple.

8. The Muldoons never seem to run out of money.

9. Are the giant rocks inside the gates of St Josephs Hospital driveway to keep the knackers at bay ??

10. How is there still no bathroom in Benny Andersons when it's been open for about 100 years?

I am proud of being from Ardee and only breakin balls so i hope nobody gets pissed off and have used the handspan for years and still do. It's just a bit of craic. Thanks to Nicola Taffee.

One more thing does anybody know why our new pup eats his own shite ?